CNU-My daughter-in-law said Christmas would be easier if I stayed away, and my son did not even raise his eyes to defend me. So I stayed home, alone, exactly as requested. …

Parent-teacher conferences. Grocery lists. The relentless, healing vulgarity of a normal Tuesday.

Sometimes I still wake at three in the morning and think about Thanksgiving—the click of Linda’s fork, Vincent staring at the table, the children going very still. In those moments, regret comes dressed in seductive alternatives. I could have let it go.continue reading …